Challenges Faced by Parents When College Students Come Home

Here’s a look at some of the most common challenges parents face when college students come home beginning with what is often the hardest. 

Understanding what the definition of home means

It may warm your heart to hear your college student say on the phone from school, “I can’t wait to be home!” But then, when they get home, you hardly see them – especially if the visit is just for a few days. Here’s the thing. While I’m sure your student misses you and wants to see you, the word “home” doesn’t just mean their nuclear family. It may also mean the house they grew up in, their bed, and almost certainly their high school friends who may be home for a visit as well. 

All of these are components of their vision of home, so as much as you may want it to be, their visit isn’t going to be just about seeing and spending time with you. You are going to have to share them. 

Adjusting to a different routine

When college students come home, it can be challenging to adjust to having your child back in the house and to accommodate their needs and schedule. If this is your only child, you’ve probably grown accustomed to having a quieter, more organized household, and now you have to readjust to having another person at home. This means dealing with more noise, more mess, and more demands on your time and attention. 

If you’ve had younger children at home, you’ve almost certainly adjusted your routine to fit their needs. Adding another person back into the mix can throw off that new balance. 

You also have to shift your daily schedule and responsibilities to take your college student into consideration. This can be difficult, especially if you’ve grown used to a certain level of freedom and flexibility in your own routine. If their visit is an extended stay, such as being home for the summer or for winter break, it may take some time to find a new rhythm that works for everyone and to navigate the changes in your household dynamics. 

Balancing independence, expectations, and rules

We send our kids off to college to hopefully become independent, free-thinking adults. That’s a good thing – right? The catch is, that doesn’t get put on hold just because they come back home. Instead of having parents and young children under the same roof, there are now parents and adults-in-training who still walk in the door with a hamper of dirty laundry. 

College students may have grown used to living independently and may have different expectations for their freedom and responsibilities. They may have also have quite simply changed and are developing different values. We, as parents, have to navigate these changes and how to enforce rules and expectations to preserve family life while also allowing our children the independence they have gotten used to. 

Mediating sibling relationships

When college students return home, it can often trigger a change in dynamics with younger siblings. Brothers or sisters may not understand why their college sibling is acting differently. On the flip side, your college student may not recognize that their siblings are changing as well. In addition, younger siblings may not understand if the college student doesn’t have to do household chores or follow house rules while they’re home. All of this can strain family dynamics, and it’s up to you, as the parent, to help ease the transition and try to maintain harmony. 

Giving college students space

While being away at college is fun and of course educational, it can be a lot. A lot of people and new experiences ALL the time. Your college student probably has a roommate and is learning how to live with someone else in a tiny space. If they live in a dorm, they probably have to share a bathroom – potentially with a lot of people. Mealtimes are often communal experiences involving many people. In addition, figuring out who they are and adulting is hard work. It can all quite literally be sensory overload. 

When your college student arrives home, they may simply need some space. While you may want to spend every moment possible with them when they’re back at home, they may just need some time alone. 

Tips for Parents to Help Make College Student’s Visit Home a Success

Here are some tips to help make your college student’s visit home a success.

Open Communication

Encourage open and honest communication with your child. Let them know that they can talk to you about anything, including their college experiences and any challenges they may be facing. Try to avoid hitting them with a barrage of questions, but don’t be afraid to ask them about how things are going as well. 

Respect Their Independence

Understand that your child has gained independence at college, and allow them the space to make their own decisions while at home. While you may expect them to spend time with the family, help out around the house, and adhere to certain rules, such as a curfew because of work schedules, it’s crucial to balance these expectations with understanding and flexibility. 

Support Their Well-being

Be mindful of your child’s mental and emotional well-being. Offer support and understanding if they are dealing with stress or other issues. Sometimes, the most loving thing you can do is let them decompress and enjoy the comforts of home. Once they’re back in their familiar setting, they may feel more comfortable opening up. 

Quality Time

Make an effort to spend quality time together as a family, but also respect your child’s need for downtime and spending time with friends. It’s important to acknowledge their newfound independence while also maintaining a sense of family connection. Remember, just as when they were in high school, sometimes the best way to make sure that you have time together to catch up is to camp out in the kitchen. Cleaning up, fixing food, or simply sitting and drinking a cup of coffee often provides a natural way for conversations to take place.

Prepare them ahead of time for changes at home

Just as your child is in a new phase of their life, you may be making changes as well. Students often return home expecting everything to be exactly as they left it only to find that their room has been converted to a home office or that the basement or bonus room is now a workout space or hobby room. This is perfectly fine and natural, but it’s only fair to let them know that ahead of time. While it may still take them some time to adjust to the change, there’s no reason to surprise them with it when they return home. 

Set Realistic Expectations

While it’s natural to have expectations, be flexible and open-minded. Your child may have different priorities and interests now, and that’s okay.

If your college student is home for an extended time, such as summer break, you will definitely need to set expectations upfront. Here are some of the things you may want to consider discussing when they come home for the summer.

• Is there a curfew?
• Will the college student be expected to help around the house?
• Are there regular times each week when spending time with the rest of the family will be expected?
• Are family dinners expected or optional?
• If family dinners are optional, is the student responsible for cooking their own meals or will you still do that?
• If there are any issues around money that need to be discussed. 

The Bottom Line on When College Students Come Home

The bottom line on when college students come home is that it’s a time of adjustment for both you and your child. By understanding the challenges, setting realistic expectations, and offering support, you can help make the transition back home a positive and enriching experience for everyone involved.

Remember, the parent-child relationship is constantly evolving, even when children are older. If you need support in dealing with issues surrounding parenting college-aged children, we’d love to have you join the Empowered Health and Wellness for Women Over 40 Facebook group!

The post What to Expect When College Students Come Home appeared first on Peppermint Tea.

**I may earn a commission if you buy through links on this page, but I only recommend products that I back. You can read my disclosure policy here.

Why Health and Wellness Gifts Are Important

Health and wellness gifts are important because they promote self-care and a focus on personal well-being. By giving the gift of wellness, you are showing the recipient that you truly care about them. Even better, it will be clear that you have taken the time to put thought and effort into finding something that fits them and their lifestyle goals. This is intentional gift giving at its best and is an approach that will bring both you and the recipient a great deal of satisfaction.

Here are a few other reasons why health and wellness gifts are important:
1. Encouraging self-care: Many people may neglect their own well-being due to busy schedules or other responsibilities. Health and wellness gifts serve as a reminder for your people to take time for themselves and prioritize their health.
2. Promoting a healthier lifestyle: Health and wellness gifts often involve activities or products that encourage healthier habits such as exercising, eating well, practicing mindfulness, or getting enough sleep. By giving these gifts, you’re helping your loved one adopt a healthier lifestyle.
3. Reducing stress: Stress is a significant factor in overall health and well-being. Health and wellness gifts, such as massage tools, stress-relief products, or relaxation items, can reduce stress levels and promote a sense of calm and relaxation.
4. Enhancing mental well-being: In this day and age, focusing on mental well-being is crucial but is something that many of us put on the back burner. Items like journals, meditation apps, or aromatherapy products can help a friend or family member improve mood, reduce anxiety, and boost mental clarity while promoting the prioritization of mental health.

Tips for Choosing the Best Wellness Gifts

Choosing the right wellness gift requires thoughtfulness and understanding of the recipient’s needs and preferences. It’s also important that you don’t use gift-giving as an opportunity to promote your own agenda for health and lifestyle changes that you think that person should be making but that they haven’t necessarily expressed an interest in. If it comes across as pressuring them, even the seemingly best health and wellness gifts will go unused.

Here are some tips to guide you:

• Consider their lifestyle: Are they always on the go or do they enjoy spending time at home? Do they prefer indoor or outdoor activities? Consider their lifestyle and choose a gift that complements it.
• Know their Interests: Do they enjoy yoga, meditation, cooking, or reading? Choose a gift that aligns with their interests.
• Understand their Needs: Are they stressed, tired, or struggling with physical discomfort? Choose a gift that addresses their specific needs.
• Think about Longevity: Choose a gift that they can use over a long period of time. This not only ensures value for your money but also provides ongoing benefits to the recipient.

Popular Gift Ideas for Health and Wellness

When it comes to gift ideas for health and wellness, I have five primary categories that they fall under. These are fitness equipment and accessories; healthy eating and kitchen gadgets; organizational and coping resources; gifts to destress, unwind, and relax; and health and wellness experiential gifts. Here’s a list of the best suggestions for each of those. 

Fitness equipment and accessories 

1. Fitness trackers

Fitness trackers can track various activities like steps, distance, calories burned, active minutes, and even sleep. This data can help the user understand their daily activity levels and make necessary adjustments to achieve fitness goals. Many fitness trackers also have built-in heart rate and blood pressure monitors. In addition, they often come with features where users can set goals and receive reminders to move if they have been inactive for a while. 

2. Resistance bands

Resistance bands can be used for a wide range of exercises and fitness levels. They make a great gift because they’re very portable, take up minimal space, and can be used to increase mobility, improve flexibility, and strengthen specific muscle groups without putting excessive strain on the body. 

3. Yoga Mats

If you know that the person you’re buying a gift for is ready to become more focused on exercise and health, a yoga mat is an essential piece of equipment to help get them started. Of course, they can be used for yoga and Pilates, but they’re also ideal for stretching, core workouts, and floor exercises. In addition, they can be rolled out anywhere and at any time for meditation and mindfulness sessions. 

4. Water bottle

Staying hydrated is crucial during workouts or any physical activity, and a high-quality water bottle can help in achieving this. Water bottles should be made of stainless steel or at the very least, BPA-free plastic and should have a flip-top lid or a built-in straw for easy drinking. They should also have a wide-mouth opening for easy filling and cleaning and a handle for carrying. I prefer a 40-ounce water bottle because I know that filling it up twice a day is getting me close to my water intake goals. 

5. Personal training sessions

A personal trainer can create personalized workouts based on the recipient’s specific goals and fitness level. This ensures that the exercises are tailored to their needs and maximize results. In addition, personal trainers can teach the correct form and technique for different exercises, reducing the risk of injuries and ensuring that the recipient gets the most out of their workouts.

Healthy eating and kitchen gadgets

1. Meal plan subscription

Busy individuals or those who struggle with meal planning and grocery shopping will appreciate the convenience of a meal plan subscription. It eliminates the need to research recipes or make grocery lists, making it easier to maintain a healthy lifestyle. When choosing a meal plan subscription, consider the recipient’s dietary preferences, lifestyle, and cooking expertise.

2. Meal-prep kit subscription

A meal-prep kit subscription offers a convenient solution for those who want to eat healthier but don’t want to or don’t have time to put too much thought into cooking. These kits often focus on providing nutritious and balanced meals, making it easier for the recipient to maintain a healthy eating routine without having to spend time planning and grocery shopping. Most meal kit subscriptions offer a wide range of recipes to choose from, including vegetarian, vegan, gluten-free, and other dietary requirements. This allows the recipient to try out different meals and discover new flavors.

3. Blender

A blender is a versatile kitchen appliance that can be used for various tasks such as blending, pureeing, and mixing. Blenders are suitable for making smoothies, but they can also be used for soups, sauces, dips, and even crushing ice. While there are very high-end, heavy-duty options out there (hello, Vitamix!) that would make great gifts, I can also say from extensive experience that the less expensive versions also do the job nicely. 

4. Nutribullet

A Nutribullet is a high-powered blender specifically designed for making smoothies and extracting nutrients from fruits and vegetables. It comes with different-sized cups and blades, allowing the user to blend and drink directly from the same container. 

5. Rice Cooker

Rice cookers are designed to simplify and streamline the cooking process. With automation and programmable settings, they eliminate the need for constant monitoring or stirring. This convenience allows the recipient to prepare healthy meals quickly and efficiently, even on busy days. Rice cookers can also do more than just cook rice. Many modern rice cookers come with multiple functions, allowing you to steam vegetables, prepare soups and stews, and even make oatmeal or quinoa. 

6. Air fryer

Air fryers use hot air circulation to cook food, requiring little to no oil. As a result, it significantly reduces the overall fat content in the food, making it a healthier alternative to deep frying. They can also do more than just fry; they can grill, roast, and even bake. This versatility allows for a wide range of healthy cooking options, including vegetables, seafood, meats, and even desserts. As another bonus, air fryers cook food faster than traditional methods. With their rapid air circulation, they can reduce cooking time by up to 30%. This feature can be particularly attractive to someone who wants to enjoy healthy meals without spending too much time in the kitchen.

If you really want to dive deep into this category, I have an entire post dedicated to the 10 Best Kitchen Gifts for Healthy Cooking. Be sure to check it out!

Gifts to de-stress, unwind, and relax

1. essential oil

Essential oils are made from natural plant extracts and have been used for centuries to promote relaxation and overall well-being. They are often used in aromatherapy due to their ability to trigger certain responses in the brain. Different scents, such as lavender, chamomile, and bergamot, have calming properties that can help ease stress and anxiety. When giving essential oils as a gift, consider including a diffuser or a guidebook that explores different uses and blends. This will enhance the recipient’s experience and help them discover new ways to incorporate essential oils into their daily routine.

2. Soy candles

I am a huge advocate for using candles to combine beauty, scent, and ambiance to provide a multi-sensory experience that can help create a calming, soothing, and relaxing atmosphere. Soy candles are best because, unlike traditional paraffin candles, they produce less soot and pollutants, making them a healthier and greener alternative. In addition, soybean oil is a renewable resource and biodegradable. I love gift sets with a variety of scents so that the recipient can experiment and see which they love the most.

3. massage gun

Massage guns are portable devices designed to provide deep tissue massage and help alleviate muscle tension and soreness. They offer multiple massage heads and speed settings to cater to individual preferences. The percussive action of the massage gun helps improve blood flow, reduce muscle stiffness, and promote relaxation. The recipient can use it to target specific areas of tension or for a full-body massage. 

4. Bath bombs

Bath bombs have gained significant popularity over the years because of their ability to create a soothing and relaxing experience. They are infused with various essential oils that release calming fragrances when they come into contact with water. Many bath bombs contain nourishing ingredients such as shea butter and coconut oil, which can help hydrate and soften the skin. This can be especially beneficial for those dealing with dry or irritated skin. The key to giving bath bombs as a gift is to buy from reputable brands that only use natural ingredients and no harsh chemicals. Since even natural ingredients can cause some irritation, if you know the recipient has sensitive skin, you’ll want to skip the bath bombs and opt for another relaxing gift option. 

5. Shower steamers

Shower steamers create a spa-like atmosphere in the shower. As they dissolve in the hot water, they release aromatic and essential oils, filling the shower with a soothing, calming scent. The recipient simply places them in a corner or on the floor of the shower, and the hot water activates the fragrance. 

6. Luxury travel pillow

A luxury travel pillow is ideal for the person in your life who is constantly on the go. Specifically designed to provide comfort and support to the neck and head while traveling, they are typically compact and lightweight, making them easy to carry around. No more falling asleep in the wrong position and waking up with a sore or cramped neck and shoulders!

7. Weighted blanket

Weighted blankets use deep touch pressure to provide a soothing sensation that can help calm anxiety and reduce stress. The added weight simulates the feeling of being hugged or held, releasing happy hormones like serotonin and oxytocin. According to Penn Medicine, “The gentle pressure on your body provided by a weighted blanket can also help to calm you by activating your parasympathetic nervous system, which lowers your heart rate when you’re stressed.” Remember, before purchasing a weighted blanket as a gift, it’s crucial to consider the recipient’s preferences and body weight. Selecting the right weight and size will ensure maximum comfort and effectiveness. 

8. Wellness journal

Research shows that journaling can help reduce stress levels. It allows people to unload their worries, anxieties, and frustrations onto paper, which can help them release negative emotions and find a sense of relief. In addition, wellness journals often include prompts or sections for gratitude, goal setting, and personal growth. Encouraging the recipient to focus on the positive aspects of their life, set intentions, or work toward self-improvement can enhance their overall well-being and promote a more relaxed state of mind.

9. Mindfulness cards

Mindfulness cards encourage the recipient to be fully present and aware of their thoughts, feelings, and sensations. They can help cultivate a sense of calm and tranquility by offering a variety of practices such as breathing exercises, meditation techniques, gratitude prompts, or simple mindfulness reminders. This variety allows the recipient to choose activities that resonate with them and align with their specific needs. I love mindfulness cards as a gift idea for health and wellness because they’re portable and easy to use anytime and anywhere. 

Organizational and coping resources 

1. Organizing session gift card

Giving a gift card for a session with a professional organizer can be a thoughtful way of helping a loved one overcome any feelings of being stuck or overwhelmed by their surroundings. Professional organizers have the knowledge and experience to declutter and organize spaces effectively and can provide personalized advice and strategies to suit the individual’s specific needs and lifestyle. The key to successfully giving this gift is that you only want to do it for someone who has specifically expressed an interest in getting help with organizing. In those cases, it could be one of the most appreciated gifts you ever give. On the other hand, if the person hasn’t said that they want to get more organized, this could be seen as a not-so-subtle passive-aggressive way of telling them you think they’re disorganized and messy. 

2. Printable packet or notebook

Putting together a packet or notebook of self-care or lifestyle hack printables makes a unique and thoughtful gift idea for health and wellness for daughters, daughters-in-law, or friends who still have younger children. If you need a good resource for these, I absolutely love the self-care printables for moms available over at Mostly Under Control. Melanie is a busy mom of four and definitely knows a thing or two about how to keep it “mostly under control.”

3. Goal tracker

Goal trackers can be an excellent gift idea for anyone who wants to improve their organization, daily coping skills, and overall productivity. As the name implies, these tools provide a structured way for the recipient to set and track their goals. It helps them break down larger goals into smaller, manageable tasks, which enhances motivation and a sense of accomplishment.

Health and wellness experiential gifts

1. Massage gift certificates

Massage therapy is well-known for its ability to reduce stress and anxiety and to promote relaxation. A massage session can help alleviate tension in muscles and release endorphins, promoting a sense of calm as well as helping to reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression, improve sleep patterns, and enhance overall mood. Massage therapy also has various physical health benefits. It can help relieve pain, enhance circulation, improve flexibility and posture, and boost the immune system. Most massage therapists offer gift certificates for single sessions or deals on packages for multiple sessions, so you’ll have plenty of options to choose from for this health and wellness gift. 

2. Reiki gift card

Reiki is a Japanese energy healing technique that promotes relaxation, stress reduction, and overall well-being. It works by channeling life energy to the recipient, promoting the smooth flow of energy throughout their body. This energy balance can lead to improved physical and emotional well-being. Reiki can be a great wellness gift option for those interested in exploring holistic healing practices. 

3. Wellness retreat packages

A wellness retreat package offers the recipient the opportunity to escape their daily routine, relax, rejuvenate, and focus on their health and wellness. This type of retreat typically includes various activities such as yoga, meditation, spa treatments, fitness classes, healthy meals, and workshops on stress management, mindfulness, and nutrition. It provides a holistic approach to wellness, addressing both physical and mental health.

4. Yoga or pilates sessions

Yoga or pilates both offer various physical health benefits such as improved flexibility, strength, posture, and balance. Engaging in yoga or pilates also provides a great opportunity for relaxation and stress relief. The breathing exercises and mindful movements during these sessions can help the individual achieve a calm and centered state of mind. Yoga and pilates classes come in various styles, levels, and durations, making it easy to find the perfect fit for the recipient’s preferences and fitness level. I recommend getting them a general gift card that would cover any of the basic classes, and then they can choose which session(s) they would like to attend. 

5. Spa day

A spa day can provide numerous benefits and is a thoughtful present for someone in need of self-care. Treatments such as massages, acupressure, facials, and aromatherapy can help the recipient to reduce stress levels, promote relaxation, and simply get a much-needed pick-me-up. These activities allow them to disconnect from their daily routine and focus on their well-being.

In addition, many spas offer treatments that help eliminate toxins from the body, such as body wraps, saunas, and steam rooms. These can aid in cleansing the body and leaving the recipient feeling refreshed and revitalized. Hot stone massages and therapeutic massages can help alleviate muscle tension, pain, and reduce inflammation, and facials and other skin care treatments can help improve skin health and appearance. Overall, if you’re trying to find a great gift idea for health and wellness for a busy woman, you really can’t go wrong with pampering them with a spa gift. 

6. One-on-One or Group health coaching

For the women in your life who have expressed an interest in getting healthier or in achieving specific health and wellness goals, one-on-one or group coaching sessions are definitely something to consider. One-on-one health coaching provides support and guidance tailored to the individual’s unique needs and goals. The coach works closely with the recipient to develop a personalized plan, taking into consideration factors such as their current health, lifestyle, and preferences. Group coaching takes a more general approach but still offers plenty of education, support, and most of all, accountability in what is usually a more affordable way.

Health coaching focuses on a holistic approach to health and wellness, considering physical, mental, and emotional well-being. Whether they are one-on-one or in a virtual group setting, the sessions can cover a wide range of topics, including nutrition advice, stress reduction techniques, sleep optimization, and lifestyle modifications to support better overall health.

It’s important to keep in mind that giving a single one-on-one health coaching session won’t be worth your money or the recipient’s time. It takes at least three months of twice-monthly sessions to give any results a fair chance of becoming lasting and sustainable habits. If you’re interested in gifting one-on-one health coaching sessions for a loved one, I’d be happy to speak with you further to help make sure it sounds like a good fit. If you’d rather consider gifting a membership to my Empowered Health and Wellness for Women Over 40 Facebook group, be sure to check out all of the details, then let me know if you have any questions.

Bottom Line on Gift Ideas for Health and Wellness

The next time you are looking for the perfect gift for a loved one, consider these gift ideas for health and wellness. They’re not only a great way to show your love and care, but they’ll also contribute to improving the recipient’s overall well-being. Happy gifting!

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Types of Goals

Most of us have had the experience of setting goals only to abandon them three weeks or even three days later. That’s usually because we didn’t follow a fairly simple structure of goal-setting that includes three primary types of goals.

Vision or meta-goal

Your vision or meta-goal is your big picture of what you want to achieve¹. It ultimately helps to define the why behind your actions and should always be stated in positive or affirming language. An example could be, “I want to be comfortable and feel good as I live a long and active life.” Compare that to the “I want to lose weight” that many people start with, and it’s fairly easy to see the difference.

Sub-goals

Sub-goals are where many of us tend to start when setting goals, but, in fact, they are really mid-level. They’re more tangible and specific and help us to get more focused on how we’re actually going to achieve our overall vision or meta-goal. You’ll probably have at least several sub-goals. Examples could be, “to develop healthy eating habits and routines” and “to add more movement throughout the day.”

Micro-goals

These are the consistent habits or actions that will allow you to achieve your sub-goals. In other words, they answer the question of “how” you’re going to achieve your sub-goal. An example for our sub-goal of developing lifelong healthy eating habits could be to eat vegetables at every meal.

How to Determine Your Vision

To determine your vision or meta-goal, think about the why behind what you currently believe is your ultimate goal. Let’s face it, for most of us, saying, “I want to increase the amount of strength training that I do,” isn’t going to get us very far. Why not? Because very few people would actually get ^out of bed at 6am on a rainy Monday morning because they want to increase the amount of strength training that they do. It doesn’t give us a true reason or motivation for doing the hard stuff.

On the flip side, thinking about wanting to be comfortable and to feel good as you live a long and active life would probably help to get you out of bed to go do your strength-training. In other words, your vision helps to guide the daily decisions and choices that you make.

How to Set Sub-Goals

For some people, determining sub-goals is easy. For others, brainstorming is needed to come up with the goals that will lead to achieving the meta-goal. You can list these out and then prioritize them to decide which one you want to start with. Some goal-setting experts tend to skip over this level of goals, but I’ve found that this structure is easy to understand and seems to be the most straightforward.

How to Set Micro-Goals

When you’re determining micro-goals, you’re thinking about the actions that will help you achieve your sub-goals. Just like with sub-goals, you need to develop a list of these and then determine which you’re going to achieve first.

If you’re in education or in the business world, you may have heard of SMART goals. This means that goals have to be Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Rewarding, and Time-based. The micro-goal level is where these come into play. If making sure that your goals fit into this framework makes sense to you, then this is what you should use.

Since I come from a journalism background, I tend to relate better to my adaptation of Bauer and Liou’s² simpler alternative of identifying “what, how, and when.”

What?

The what is your goal. It is what you are saying you want to do or achieve.

How?

My version of “How” has several components to consider.

1. Make your goal public. You can do this by announcing it to yourself and others. Many people use social media for this, while others simply announce it to their spouse or family.
2. Build in a reward system. This should be something that offers extrinsic motivation. An example could be buying a new yoga top after exercising for five days a week for a month.
3. Measurable. This means that you can measure your progress toward your micro-goals in a quantifiable way. Instead of just saying “I’m going to walk every day,” say “I’m going to walk for at least 30 minutes every day.” Another way that you can measure your progress is by using a goal tracker (paid link). They are available in a physical form and can be placed where you spend the most time or you can use an app.
4. Adjustable. What is the Plan B if something happens to alter Plan A? If you’re trying to walk for 30 minutes every morning before work and it’s pouring outside one morning, what will you do instead?
5. Realistic. You need to make sure that your goal actually makes sense and is achievable. It should also be something that is truly within your control.

When?

The last step for setting micro-goals is to think about by when are they going to be achieved. If your micro-goal is to exercise for 30 minutes every day and you currently aren’t exercising at all, you’ll need to allow time to gradually add it in. Your when could be that you have built up to exercising every day after a month.

Since our overarching goal with all of this is to create lasting, sustainable change, the hope is that your micro-goals will turn into habits that you will continue as part of your healthy lifestyle. As you achieve one, you can add in another until you feel like the sub-goals that you’ve been working toward aren’t goals anymore but are a regular part of your life.

Lean on Your Community

If you have questions about any of this or need support in achieving your healthy lifestyle goals, feel free to message me @peppermintteahealth on Instagram or through Facebook. You can also email me Robyn@peppermint-tea.com.

Sources

1. Goal-Focused Coaching: Theory and Practice. Yossi Ives and Elaine Cox. 2012.
2. Nutrition Counseling & Education Skill Development. Kathleen D. Bauer and Doreen Liou. 2012

The post How to Set Goals and Achieve Them appeared first on Peppermint Tea.

If you’re starting to think about your health in a holistic way – where you recognize that the mind, body, nutrition, and some say spirit are all connected – then you may have heard of Reiki. It’s practiced in some hospitals, and it can also be taken to a very spiritual place. So, what in the world is this very intriguing technique and is it something that we should be exploring in terms of our health? I, for one, wanted to find out, so I went to Reiki Master teacher Deborah Dixon to get some answers. In addition to having her own private practice called Subtle Wellness , Deborah conducts trainings at Duke Integrative Medicine. In this Q&A, I share what she had to say about the many benefits of Reiki and why it might be worth exploring further as yet another tool to have in our healthy living toolkit. 

Peppermint Tea & Me: What is Reiki?

Deborah Dixon: Reiki is explained a lot of different ways. It’s usually explained as a simple stress reduction technique and as a technique that channels universal life force energy or animating life force energy. It’s talked about as energy medicine or as vibrational medicine because it raises the vibration of a person. While Reiki as a hands-on healing practice already existed in Japan, the practice as we know it was developed in the 1920s. It arose from the spiritual awakening of Dr. Mikao Usui. What he brought to his hands-on healing was unique, and that has become what we know around the globe now as Reiki. 

PTM: Is Reiki Based in Science?

DD: To say that it’s science-based is a little bit of a stretch because it didn’t originate or evolve from any kind of scientific inquiry. However, we know now through science and research that we can use science to understand that Reiki is working and that it’s having a physical, mental and emotional impact. However, to explain it in terms of science is a little more difficult. Quantum physics probably gets the closest. 

We can look at it in the way we maybe look at light, the way we look at vibration, but I don’t think that science is able to fully explain it yet. The best roadmap will be neuroscience and how it’s been evolving since the middle of the 20^thcentury to explain how embodied and contemplative practices like meditation and mindfulness can impact the body. In that way, we know that Reiki engages the parasympathetic nervous system, which is then a cascade of benefits to the body and mind. So, it’s interesting. There’s a lot of science there, but there’s also a sort of mystical core behind it. 

PTM: Is Reiki considered to be a type of alternative medicine?

DD: While it is used in hospitals and clinical settings, I think it’s usually referred to as a complementary modality or an alternative modality. You may hear it referred to as energy medicine, bio-field techniques and bio-field medicine. For me, as a practitioner and teacher, I shy away from talking about medicine and healing and using those terms with it simply because it’s not licensed in any way. It’s totally a complementary, adjunct therapy. Those of us who practice it do not diagnose or prescribe in any way. I personally like to keep the medical terminology out so as not to mislead people. Some of us look at it more as spiritual healing, metaphysical healing and like to keep it there. 

PTM: How is Reiki done?

DD: It is usually done with light touch. The client is fully clothed, often reclining, like on a massage table, but it can be done with the person sitting in a chair. It can also be done at a distance because it doesn’t have to involve touch. 

You can send Reiki to a different location, and it can be sent back in time. You can do that by sending it to periods in your life, where you’ve had distress and trauma. Sometimes that’s harder for people to wrap their mind around. If you’re into quantum physics, sometimes it’s not that hard. It’s odd, what seems like the most “woo woo” sometimes is the part that’s backed up by science a little bit more because there is the idea that there’s an intelligent part of us that’s existing outside of time and space.

I think ultimately, the advances in neuroscience are going to help us understand it better. Because what’s happened to us in our life is stored in our body. It’s stored in our nervous system. So, when people are working with trauma, they’re releasing a tangible thing that’s residing in their body. In Reiki, we’re working with that energy. 

PTM: So, the focus is the energy and not necessarily the touch part of it?

DD: There is a lot of warmth in my hands. It’s easy to think that it’s body heat and that it’s moving from my physical being to your physical being, but it’s more energy than we know – even when we’re in person. When I do a distant session, I’ll feel the energy in my hands, the same as I do when I’m in person. Many people will find it very similar to doing an in-person session. 

To be honest, all these years, I never offered distant Reiki professionally. I focused on what was easy for people to wrap their mind around. But I did distant all the time with other Reiki people and sometimes with people that would request it and were students. It’s really just been the last year that I’ve done so much professionally because of the pandemic. People have actually accepted it better than I would have thought. I definitely had clients who I thought, “That’s going to be a hard one for them,” but trying it, it’s really just like an in-person session. The proof is in the energy and the experience itself. 

PTM: Are there specific points that you focus on?

DD: There are some lineages, particularly in Japan that do not have prescribed hand positions. That came up early on in the development of Reiki in certain lineages with a clinician wanting to have practitioners at every bed and wanting to have something more systematic. At that point, it became a full body treatment that involves the hand positions that move from the head to the feet. It doesn’t necessarily have to go that way, but it usually does. You’ll find that when you do energy work that you feel the person’s energy field moving down that central column. If you’re familiar with the chakra system, it’s moving down the chakras. Some medical people will practice Reiki focusing on the glands, which actually match up with the chakras. So, regardless of what direction you’re going with it, you’ll often find that people have their hands in those same places. 

PTM: What are the benefits of Reiki physically, mentally and emotionally?

DD: The benefits of Reiki can be numerous. Because it engages the parasympathetic nervous system, it’s a stress-reduction technique. Stress reduction reduces the heart rate and increases digestion, lowers respiration, and truly, it’s that reset. Reiki, like meditation, like yoga and other mindfulness and body practices, it pulls us back into that part of the brain that is safe and relaxed and at rest. It’s the calm mind. It’s order, it’s ease, it’s that sense of wellbeing. I’ve literally had people sit up from the table and say “Oh! Everything seems okay.”

You’ll also find a lot about it reducing anxiety, being good for insomnia and it’s excellent for burnout. A lot of nurses practice it, not just on the patients but on each other for burnout. Reiki is also good for pain management and increasing circulation, and it’s really good with chemotherapy. These are things that have been researched. Those of us who practice it, oh my goodness. We see amazing things happen. If you keep showing up for that practice, you’ll see shifts in all sorts of physical issues. 

PTM: How long does it take to see the benefits of Reiki?

DD: The benefits of Reiki can be seen or felt immediately, but it often can take weeks or months. I’ve seen people immediately have sort of a bounce-back from things like depression, but not always. There’s been research with depression where people receive Reiki once or twice a week for six weeks and that was sort of the sweet spot. I would say that if people come weekly or bi-weekly, that is really transformative. It’s very individual. When clients come, I always tell them that it’s a craving. They’ll know if this is doing something for them, they’ll know when to come back because it is very individual. 

PTM: What kind of training is required for Reiki?

DD: It’s very easy and accessible for everybody. It’s important to know that there’s no official oversight or licensing for Reiki whatsoever because that can be a little confusing when you’re looking for training. You’ll see things about certifications and licensing but those are just what individual teachers and companies are creating. The foundational levels are level I and level II. Level I focuses on self-practice and clearing. Level II goes a little bit further into those techniques and introduces distant work and working with others. It’s usually after Level II training that people might choose to practice professionally. 

PTM: So, someone could do Level I and be able to do it on themselves? 

DD: Yes. Self-treatment and self-healing and self-clearing are the foundation of the practice. That begins in Level I. No matter how far you go or how long you practice, that’s still the foundation of it. That’s where you get your mojo – from that work on yourself and the clearing of yourself. Then you can add working on others or other things. People Reiki many things. They’ll work with their animals, they’ll work with plants, and they’ll work with food.

PTM: If someone is considering Reiki for the first time, what should they look for in a practitioner?

DD: I would say that it’s very individual, but the main thing is to see if you feel good with the person. If you resonate with the person. Talk to the practitioner first. If I were to ask a question, I would ask, “How often do you do self-treatments or how many clients do you have a week?” That goes to the idea that it’s the practice that makes the practitioner. A person could have a gazillion certificates, and they could be a Reiki master for 10 years, but if they haven’t done it this month, then their session may or may not be good. 

I have Level I practitioners that at first, they are not natural. They come out of it saying, “I don’t feel anything. It didn’t take with me.” I tell them to go home, put their hands on themselves every day and do the self-treatments. They will come back to a Reiki share in a few weeks and their hands are on fire. They are channeling energy. So much so that I would go to them. 

So, you want to find someone who is obviously doing it enough to be out there doing it professionally. Truthfully though, if you have someone living next door who may not work on a lot of other people but who is a devoted practitioner, and that person works on themselves every day, that’s an excellent person to get Reiki from. 

The Cost of Reiki

The cost of Reiki is usually between $45 for distant sessions to $60-$75 for in-person sessions. A session can be anywhere between 45 to 90 minutes depending on the options offered by specific practitioners and the setting in which it’s being done. 

You might also be interested in checking out these studies on biofield science, which go more in-depth on the energy field that each of us have. 

• Biofield Science and Healing: History, Terminology and Concepts
• Case Report: Energy Field Changes Approaching and During the Death Experience
• The Biofield Hypothesis: Its Biophysical Basis and Role in Medicine

Bottom Line on the Benefits of Reiki

Deborah says that the bottom line on the benefits of Reiki is that it’s recognizing, tapping into, receiving and in some cases releasing the energy that exists in all of us. If you decide to try it, it’s best at least the first time to go in with an open mind and very few expectations. Just be open to the experience and see what happens. 

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If you’re having trouble getting inspired to declutter your home, here’s one potential motivator. Think about all of the money you can save! If nothing else gets you going, maybe that will. When I started decluttering back in the winter, it was because I had had enough. I was done with all the stuff in my surroundings clogging up my physical and mental space. What I didn’t know and have come to quickly find out was how much money I would save as a result. And I’m not even done yet! 

Because living abundantly through being frugal is so important to me, if I’d thought about it in this way earlier, it might have motivated me to do it sooner. If the same is true for you, I hope what I’ve learned will help you.

You Can Find What You Need When You Need It

This is no small thing! I’ve kept a tally. I’ve been at this for several months and have easily already saved well over $150 on things I didn’t buy. These were things I thought I needed simply because I couldn’t find what I needed when I needed them because they were hidden under piles of other stuff. 

The dumbbell that I was getting ready to replace because I hadn’t been able to find it? Found! Underneath old pillows in the floor of my closet that I’d hung on to because I thought I might need them some day. In reality, no one would ever sleep on those old, dirty things and they were just keeping me from seeing what I really needed to see. 

The gift bags and tissue paper that I knew I had plenty of somewhere but couldn’t see where they should have been? Found! Underneath the old rolls of wrapping paper that had remnants left on them but wouldn’t have been able to wrap anything. 

The spices I was getting ready to buy AGAIN even though I knew I had bought them fairly recently? Found! Behind jars of other spices that I had duplicates of because I kept replacing them when I couldn’t find what I needed!  

You get the point…

You May Be Able to Sell Things That You’re Not Using

Decluttering your home is different than organizing. Decluttering is getting rid of things that you don’t use or need. Organizing is putting the things that you do have in an order that makes them easier to find and use. If you’re truly decluttering, the things that you’re getting rid of may no longer be useful to you, but they may be useful to someone else. That means that selling them through Craig’s List, Facebook Marketplace or in a good old-fashioned yard sale might be an option. 

If You Have a Clutter-Free Outlook, You Probably Won’t Be Buying as Much

While decluttering doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ll become a minimalist, you will probably figure out fairly quickly that less can be more. As you declutter your home, I feel certain that you will start looking more critically at the things that you’re considering bringing into the house in the first place. That doesn’t mean that you won’t ever buy something again just because you want it, but it will become more of the exception than the rule. For this, your wallet will thank you! 

Decluttering Your Kitchen May Encourage You to Cook at Home More

If opening your pantry or a kitchen cabinet door makes you feel so queasy from the mess that you immediately call for take-out, it’s time to declutter. Getting rid of that mess can make cooking enjoyable again and something that you may want to do more often. Not only is this better for your bank account, but it will be better for your health as well.

Decluttering May Prevent You from Having to Buy a Bigger Home

Talk about a money saver! This sounds pretty extreme, but it is a possibility. In fact, I would strongly suggest the next time that you get dissatisfied with the space that you have in your current home, that you clean out a closet. If your satisfaction level doesn’t start going up, then begin taking it room by room. After you’ve decluttered pretty much your entire house, if you still feel like you need more space, it might be time to start looking. My prediction is that you may realize that you don’t need more space, you just need less stuff.

You May Find Money and/or Gift Cards That You Forgot About

The idea of finding money and/or gift cards may seem random, but I’m here to say that it can happen. I recently found money in old purses that I thought I couldn’t part with for one reason or another, and I found gift cards tucked away in drawers. I can’t promise it will happen every time, but certainly if the clutter has been building up, your chances are pretty good.  

Decluttering Can Prevent Costly Mistakes in Other Areas of Your Life

Decluttering is just that powerful! Have you ever left the house so frazzled in the morning that you ended up making a big mistake at work? Or has living in a cluttered house ever worn on you so much mentally that you treated other members of your family badly?  All of those mistakes can come with a steep price. Strained relationships, lost confidence in you at work, and poor mental health overall are serious and very real possible consequences of not learning to declutter. Again, I speak from experience here. It is amazing how much lighter and more together you can feel not having to wade through a bunch of needless stuff just to get to the dryer or to get to your shoes. 

Bottom Line on Decluttering Your Home

The fairly simple but often seemingly overwhelming act of decluttering your home won’t automatically make you a millionaire. But, it may very well make you feel like you’ve hit the jackpot. As we’ve seen here, decluttering can help you save money in quite a few ways, but most importantly it will allow you to simply make more space in your life for what truly matters. 

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Do you have a hobby? If so, is it music, food or gardening-oriented? Or would you rather be running or doing some type of art or craft? If you do have a hobby, I’m jealous. I don’t truly have one, and I need one. I can’t even say that kids, work or the general demands of life got me sidetracked from doing the things that I used to love. Other than reading, I’ve never really had a hobby. I’ve dabbled in different things – violin, stamp collecting, calligraphy, etc. but I’ve never truly found anything that I could just get lost in. Now though, it’s time for me to find a hobby, and maybe the same is true for you. If so, we’re going to look at the benefits of hobbies and some possible ways of finding one. 

What is a Hobby?

Before we do any of that, we have to first get clear on what a hobby is and what it isn’t. First off, hobbies and interests aren’t the same thing. Job site Indeed’s editorial team helps us to clarify this distinction. The writers of this article say that “A hobby is an activity you may complete in your free time that brings you pleasure¹.” It’s an ongoing experience that you can regularly commit to outside of work hours. 

They say an interest, on the other hand, “is a desire or need to learn more about a specific subject¹.” You can have a work-related interest and interests can even become hobbies, but the defining difference is that hobbies should take place in your free time. According to Indeed, “If you’re making an income or participating in the activity during work hours, it’s usually considered an interest rather than a hobby¹.” 

Benefits of Hobbies

The scientifically proven benefits of hobbies are numerous. For one thing, they make us healthier. One study found that participants had more positive and less negative mood, more interest, less stress and lower heart rate when engaging in leisure than when they weren’t². Another study found that leisure activities are associated with lower blood pressure, total cortisol, waist circumference and body mass index. They’re also linked to the perception that participants had of themselves as being in better health³. 

Another benefit is that hobbies may make you better at your job. A study published in the Journal of Occupational and Organizational Psychology shows that creative activity outside of work helped participants to better recover from a demanding work environment, which reduced burn-out and overall stress levels. In addition, it found that being creative outside of work was also associated with more creativity on the job⁴. 

And finally, hobbies allow us to break away from our everyday experiences without feeling like we should be “on task,” doing something productive or that we have to be the best at whatever we’re doing. Kettering Global says that “Engaging in a hobby can be a mental escape, help us hone a skill, or just provide an opportunity to socialize with others⁵.” In other words, they allow us to simply have fun, challenge ourselves in new or different ways without having to worry about the end result, or just give us a common interest to share with others. 

Why I Need a Hobby (And Why You May Need One Too)

Where I usually run into problems when it comes to hobbies is that I have many interests, but as someone who is naturally “a worker,” I tend to turn everything I do into work or a project. Engaging with my interests then begins to feel like an obligation and there goes my ability to turn my brain off and relax. As a result, I feel like I’m always “on” or that there’s something else that I should be doing. If this is true for you as well, we both need a hobby. 

How I’m Going to Find a Hobby

So how do we go about finding a hobby? How do we find something that we enjoy doing or are passionate about if we have no idea of what that is? Clearly, I’m not an expert on this, but I know it involves being willing to try something new. 

A Lesson Guide that I found online on the Importance of Hobbies from the University of Arkansas Division of Agriculture Research & Extension has some useful tips⁶. Here are just a few of them:

• Take it back to your childhood. Think back to what you loved doing as a kid. 
• Try a couple of ideas on for size. Explore a craft, sports or book store and see what captures your attention.
• Find something that will make you forget about your day. If it feels like it’s going to be stressful instead of exciting to learn, then it’s probably not for you. 
• Notice what you love to buy as guilty pleasures. That item might be pointing you toward your hobby.  
• Think of the last thing that made you forget to eat. This should be outside of just simply a hectic day at work of course. What did you become so absorbed in that you completely lost track of time and didn’t think about eating? Somewhere in that activity may be your hobby. 

In addition to following these tips, I’m also going to use HobbyHelp’s list of 105 possible hobbies to give me ideas. While there are some on there that I can immediately cross off because they simply don’t sound appealing to me at all, there are others that might just be contenders. 

Bottom Line on the Benefits of Hobbies

If you’re thinking that all of this sounds like too much work and that something that you’re passionate about should just automatically find you, I would encourage you to think again. Finding a hobby shouldn’t become another source of stress in your life, but there’s a difference between work and exerting some effort toward something. As I think we’ve seen here, there are many benefits to finding a hobby, and I’m looking forward to discovering what mine is. 

Lean on Your Community

Do you have a hobby? If so, let us know what it is in the comments to give us all some ideas. If you don’t have a hobby but some of what’s been said here inspires you, let us know what you figure out as well. 

Sources

1. Indeed. 5 Key Differences Between Hobbies and Interests. https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/difference-between-hobbies-and-interests
2. Zawadzki, M.J., Smyth, J.M. & Costigan, H.J. Real-Time Associations Between Engaging in Leisure and Daily Health and Well-Being. ann. behav. med. 49, 605–615 (2015). https://doi.org/10.1007/s12160-015-9694-3
3. Pressman SD, Matthews KA, Cohen S, et al. Association of enjoyable leisure activities with psychological and physical well-being. Psychosom Med. 2009;71(7):725-732. doi:10.1097/PSY.0b013e3181ad7978. https://bpspsychub.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/joop.12064
4. Eschleman, Kevin J., Madsen, Jamie, Alarcon, Gene, & Barelka, Alex. Benefiting From Creative Activity: The Positive Relationship Between Creative Activity, Recovery Experiences, and Performance-Related Outcomes. Journal of Occupational and Organizational Psychology. April 2014.https://bpspsychub.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/joop.12064
5. Kettering Global. Why Hobbies are Important? https://online.kettering.edu/news/2019/04/15/why-hobbies-are-important
6. University of Arkansas Division of Agriculture Research & Extension. Importance of Hobbies Lesson Guide.https://www.uaex.edu/life-skills-wellness/extension-homemakers/Hobbies_LessonGuide.pdf

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I am a firm believer in the power of a morning routine. How we start the day has a huge impact on how the rest of the day will go. If we keep hitting the snooze button, wake up at the last possible second, rush to get dressed and get the kids off to school, skip breakfast, gulp down a cup of coffee and barely get to work on time, the chances that we’re going to be our best for the day are slim. On the other hand, waking up early enough to start the day in an intentional way stands a much better chance of setting us up for success as well as boosting our overall health and wellness. In this article, I’m looking at what a morning routine is, why it’s important and some of my tried-and-true morning routine ideas for getting the day started off right. 

What is a Morning Routine?

By definition, a routine is regularly doing things in a fixed order, usually at a particular time. A morning routine is any type of routine that happens as you’re starting your day – whether that day begins at 8am or 11pm for shift workers. According to Northwestern Medicine, “routines offer a way to promote health and wellness through structure and organization.” While we don’t want to have every minute of our day scheduled, it is beneficial to have some structure, otherwise it’s easy to be unorganized, distracted and not accomplish the things that we want to. 

While there can be many different views on what a morning routine is, I look at it as what I do before my workday starts. It is what helps to get me in the right place physically and mentally for the day ahead. Depending on your stage in life and whether you work from home or have a commute, a morning routine can take 30 minutes or two hours. It’s whatever works best for you. Some days, you may have to adjust it a bit, but for the most part, your morning routine is how you regularly start the day. 

Morning Routine Ideas

If you listen to interviews with some of the world’s most successful people, you’ll find that most rely on a morning routine of some type. Even before I learned this, it was simply something that came naturally to me. I knew that I felt better when I started my day in a more structured way and that I felt worse when I didn’t. It wasn’t too hard to figure out which I preferred. Here are some morning routine ideas that I can highly recommend. 

Set your alarm

If you have to be somewhere at a set time, get kids off to school or have any other morning obligations, you’re probably going to need to set an alarm in order to get your morning routine in. This may mean moving your bedtime forward a bit so that you get the sleep you need, but I can promise that this habit will be worth it. After you’ve conditioned your body to your new routine, setting an alarm may not even be necessary. 

Write in a gratitude journal

This doesn’t have to take long. Just list 5-10 things, people or experiences that you’re grateful for. An article in Greater Good Magazine cites gratitude expert Robert Emmons as saying that gratitude affirms “that there are good things in the world, gifts and benefits we’ve received.” This can be powerful if we’re struggling to see past our own problems or are feeling down or stressed. 

Write in a free writing journal or do a brain dump

A free writing journal gives us a chance to reflect on our experiences or anything that we’re feeling. A brain dump offers the opportunity to clear mental space by getting all the thoughts running through our mind onto a piece of paper. Both exercises help to acknowledge and process extraneous thoughts and feelings that may be causing us anxiety or taking up mental energy. 

Do some kind of exercise or movement

While at least 150 minutes a week is what the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services’ Physical Activity Guidelines for Americans recommends, any amount is going to give you some health benefits. Even if you usually get your main exercise in during the afternoon, stretching or moving your body in some way in the morning will help to wake you up and get your body going after a night of sleeping. 

Read

If finding time to read is tough, carving out a few minutes in the morning can be a relaxing way to ease into the day. 

Get dressed for the day

While this may be a bit obvious, I include it as part of a morning routine because that makes it an intentional activity that I have to set aside time to do as part of my preparation for the day. If I don’t look at it in that way, I rush through the process, already feeling frazzled and as if I should be doing something else.

Fix breakfast

If you don’t take the time to fix breakfast for yourself because you simply don’t need it, then skip this. If you don’t fix breakfast for yourself because you don’t think you have time, then making it part of your morning routine will do wonders for your health and your pocketbook. Even if you don’t have time to eat it before you leave the house, take something with you to eat on the way or when you arrive at work.

Update your budget

What?? You might ask if you haven’t read my post on Creating a Budget for a Healthier You. As I mention there, taking 5 minutes to update your budget (what used to be known as balancing your checkbook) every day makes it so that it’s not an overwhelming task at one time. It also helps to guide your decisions throughout the day. 

Read or watch local news

Keeping on top of what’s happening in your local community is just as important as keeping up with national and international news. With all of the online resources available these days, it’s fairly easy to stay on top of national news. Local news, on the other hand, is easy to lose sight of. Setting aside a few minutes each morning to do this will keep you on top of what is happening in your own backyard.

Reattach to work

I love this one! If we’re successfully detaching from work at the end of the day, it only stands to reason that reattaching at the beginning of the day would make sense. Researchers found that reattaching, or rebuilding a mental connection to work, is important for staying engaged and focused during the day. 

This article in Greater Good Magazine suggests that in preparation for your workday, you ask yourself the following questions.

1. Why does the work I do matter to me? How does my work impact the lives of others?
2. Who are the people—both at work and in my personal life—who support me and my professional success?
3. What would I like to focus on today?

While you won’t be able to fit all of the above ideas into your morning routine, I recommend picking 2-4 that resonate with you and see how they work. 

The Morning Routine That Has Served Me Best

Depending on what phase of life you’re in, you’ll probably need to switch up your morning routine to accommodate your other obligations. You may also need to adjust the time that you wake up. When my boys were younger, having a little quiet time to myself was so important to me that I woke up at 5am just to fit it in. While that was definitely early, it would have been much harder on me not to fit it in at all. Now that I don’t have to do everything for my one son still at home, I get to sleep until 5:45am or 6am. 

Here’s a look at the most recent version of my morning routine that has served me best. 

5:45am = wake-up and get dressed in workout clothes

6 – 6:15am = meditation

6:15 – 6:30am = journaling

6:30 – 7:15am = exercise/stretching and listen to local and national news

7:15 – 7:45am = get dressed/fix breakfast

7:45 – 8am = eat breakfast, update budget, reattach for work

8am = start work

** This has been my best pandemic routine. In “normal” times, I would allow for the five-minute drive to and from the gym.

Clearly, life happens. If I need to go for a stretch of letting myself sleep a little later, I do. But if I let myself go for long periods of time without making room for my morning routine, I definitely start feeling off and know that I need to get back on track.

Bottom Line on Morning Routines

The point in all of this has been to give you plenty of morning routine ideas to choose from that might work for you. The key is being realistic about the kind of time that you have or are willing to make in the mornings to fit it in. Even if you can only sit quietly and then exercise for a few minutes, those are things that will help you start the day feeling better than if you had slept late and rushed out the door.

Do you have a morning routine? If so, let us know in the comments what it is so that we can all get ideas.

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I am a power napper. There, I said it, and I’m not ashamed to admit it. In fact, I’ll scream it from the rooftop if I need to. The world needs more power nappers!! It’s long been one of my survival tools, but since I started living a healthier lifestyle, I consider it as much a part of my wellness routine as exercise and what I eat. If you’ve ever wanted to learn how to power nap but thought you couldn’t, I’m going to fill you in on how long a power nap really is and how to do it.  

What is a Power Nap?

In order to understand what a power nap is, it may first be easier to look at what it isn’t. A power nap is not an hours-long deep sleep that you occasionally take in the afternoon when you’ve stayed up too late the night before. It also doesn’t leave you feeling groggy or discombobulated. Far from it. 

A power nap lasts less than 30 minutes and leaves you feeling energized and rested. Multiple studies back this up^1,2,3 and even show that getting in a few minutes of stage 2 sleep is the most beneficial in improving alertness and performance¹. According to this article published by the University of Michigan Health System, stage 1 sleep involves light sleep and usually lasts less than 10 minutes. In stage 2 sleep, your muscles become more relaxed and you may begin to have slow-wave brain activity⁴. For me, between 15-20 minutes is ideal for giving my brain, body and eyes a much-needed break.

How to Power Nap

If sleeping for a short period of time seems impossible to you, you may be right. Power napping isn’t for everyone. Some people do get into too deep of a sleep or take too long to go to sleep in the first place. If that’s you, and you’ve tried power napping before, don’t force it. Accept the fact that you’re simply not a power napper and move on. 

On the other hand, if you consistently find yourself reaching for mid-afternoon caffeine or something sweet just to give you energy, I highly recommend trying the more natural approach of learning how to power nap. You’ll notice that I said, “learn how to power nap.” Yes, power napping is a routine or habit that usually has to be learned. The following steps will show you how. 

Find the right time

If you work on an 8-5pm or 9-5pm schedule, you’re probably familiar with the afternoon energy slump or the “post-lunch dip¹.” If you’re a shift worker, you have the equivalent, it’s just at a different time. For the purposes of this post, we’re going to focus on those who work 8-5pm. 

Assuming that you’ll usually need to attach your nap to your lunch break, I suggest shooting for some time between 12:30-3pm for your nap. If you take it after 3pm, it could disrupt your regular sleep at night. 

12:30-3pm is also when the physical cues that I need a nap kick in. These cues aren’t easy to miss. They’re as obvious as my eyelids starting to droop or me getting really grouchy. There are also more subtle cues such as staring at my computer and not really registering what I’m reading or writing. If I’m interacting with others, I find it hard to concentrate on what they’re saying or to remember what was said. 

If I push through and wait until after 3pm to try to nap, I’m usually past the point where I can. My mind simply won’t shut down. If I can catch a window around 1pm when I begin noticing these things starting to happen, my brain is more than ready to stop for a while, and sleep comes quickly. 

The main thing when determining when the right time is to nap is that it should be about the same every day. It can certainly change if needed, but for the most part, you’ll need to teach your body that this is the time to shut down for a bit. 

Find the right location

Finding the right location is just as important to learning how to power nap as finding the right time. While it doesn’t have to be completely dark, you don’t want to have a light shining in your face. I usually find that having the blinds open on the windows is fine and allows enough light in to signal to my body that it isn’t night and that I don’t need to go into a deep sleep.  

You’ll also want to be in a fairly quiet place if possible. If you work outside the home, that means closing the door to your office if you have one or being in your car. Trust me, a car is a perfectly fine place to nap. 

Get comfortable

Getting comfortable is key when it comes to power napping. Once you get to be a pro, comfort takes a back seat to simply making sure that you get it in, but when you’re beginning, there are a couple of elements to have in place. These include something soft(ish) to lie on and a pillow or something soft for your head. 

If you’re working from home, lying on your bed may be an option. If you find that you tend to sleep too deeply there, just lie on your couch. Going to your car is also an option if you don’t have a soft surface to lie on at work. You can easily lay the seat back and be perfectly fine. Having a pillow, scarf, coat or something soft for your head makes it easier to get comfortable and elevates it to a more natural sleeping position.

If I’m at home, I like to have a blanket to put over me, even if it’s in the summer. It simply feels more comfortable. 

Eliminate interruptions

The whole point in a power nap is to take a few minutes for yourself in the middle of the day to recharge. It’s hard to do that if your phone is ringing, buzzing or in any way letting you know that the rest of the world needs your attention during that time. That’s why I always turn on the “Do Not Disturb” function on my phone just before I’m lying down. While my family’s calls can get through during that time if it’s urgent, they also know that it had better be urgent. 

That leads us to the second step in eliminating interruptions. Letting people who really need to know generally when you will be out of touch for a few minutes. That doesn’t mean that you have to announce it to the world that you’re taking a nap, but if you have a usual time that you’re shooting for, just let those who absolutely need to know that you won’t be available during that time. With most of my family doing school and working from home right now, I time when I lie down with when my son is in class. I also text my husband to let him know so that he doesn’t come downstairs while I’m lying on the couch. 

Set an alarm

Setting an alarm is crucial for conditioning your body to the power nap. As you’re just starting out, I suggest setting it for five minutes before you need to be back on task or for no longer than 30 minutes – whichever is sooner. That gives you time to wake up and get back to wherever you need to be. After you’ve become a power napping expert, you’ll probably find that you don’t need to set your alarm. Your body will simply know when it’s been 15-30 minutes. 

Focus on breathing

If you’re finding it hard to shut off your thoughts after about 30 seconds, focus on your breathing. Count to four as you breathe in, hold it for a second and then count to four as you breathe out. That should take the focus off your thoughts and put you in a good place for sleep to find you quickly. 

Practice

Like many of the other things that we do, learning how to power nap takes practice. You are not going to be successful at it if you only do it once or twice a month. It needs to become part of your regular routine. Yes, your body may become reliant on your nap, but you can always fall back on caffeine if you can’t get it in and you’re needing a quick pick me up. In this case though, the caffeine will be a mid-day rarity as opposed to something that you have to have to get through every day. 

It’s also important to note that once you’ve practiced enough and conditioned your body to power nap, you’ll be able to do it pretty much anywhere at anytime if needed. Now that’s a useful skill to have!

Bottom Line on Learning How to Power Nap

The bottom line on learning how to power nap is that it’s a free tool that you can use to be as productive and sharp as possible in a natural way. Take it from a power napping pro, it’s a skill that is possible to learn and could make the difference between feeling like you’re just getting through the day and being the best that you can be. I know which of the two that I highly recommend. 

Sources

1. Hayashi M, Motoyoshi N, Hori T. Recuperative power of a short daytime nap with or without stage 2 sleep. Sleep. 2005 Jul;28(7):829-36. PMID: 16124661. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/16124661/
2. McDevitt EA, Sattari N, Duggan KA, Cellini N, Whitehurst LN, Perera C, Reihanabad N, Granados S, Hernandez L, Mednick SC. The impact of frequent napping and nap practice on sleep-dependent memory in humans. Sci Rep. 2018 Oct 10;8(1):15053. doi: 10.1038/s41598-018-33209-0. PMID: 30305652; PMCID: PMC6180010. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30305652/
3. Dhand R, Sohal H. Good sleep, bad sleep! The role of daytime naps in healthy adults. Curr Opin Pulm Med. 2006 Nov;12(6):379-82. doi: 10.1097/01.mcp.0000245703.92311.d0. PMID: 17053484. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/17053484/
4. University of Michigan Health System. Stages of Sleep. https://www.uofmhealth.org/health-library/hw48331

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I will fully admit that the entire process of paying bills is something that I used to dread. Even when I knew there was enough money in the bank to cover everything, it was stressful. That’s in large part because I was so disorganized in my approach to the practice. As a result, paper clutter piled up, I would end “bill paying night” in a horrible mood, and there were usually late payments that had to be factored in. As I learned how to get my financial house in order, I realized that developing a budget was only part of the process. I also had to get organized. It is from my many years of doing this that I offer these tips on how to organize bills for less stress. I truly hope they help you as much as they have me. 

Coordinate Your Billing System with Your Budget

Ideally, your billing system should be directly tied to your monthly budgets. While you can organize bills effectively without doing that (see how below), coordinating your billing system with your budget makes it much simpler. If you don’t currently develop monthly budgets, be sure and check out  Creating a Budget for a Healthier You. In that post, I walk through how to take control of your finances by creating an attitude of abundance.

To summarize though, budgets can be developed by using nothing more than a pen and paper or a spreadsheet. You can also use an app or software if you want to go more high-tech. The bottom line is that every expense or categories of expenses should be a separate item in your budget. This includes expenses that are recurring, anticipated but periodic, and unexpected. They should be included in the monthly budget in which the bill will be paid.

Electronic versions of your monthly budgets should be kept in a Budget and Billing folder on your computer. Within that, create a folder for the year and then another called “Budgets.” That’s where your monthly budgets should live in a spreadsheet. 

If you prefer to store your Budget and Billing information in the cloud, I can highly recommend Airtable. Google, Apple, Dropbox or Box accounts are other options as well. 

Create an Electronic Bills and Receipts Folder

Whether you store your documents on your computer or in the cloud, you’ll want to create a Bills and Receipts folder within your Budget and Billing folder. Within that, create a folder for each month and then create folders by business or category. 

Create a Physical Bills and Receipts Folder

For bills that aren’t electronic and come through the mail, create files in your personal physical file system with at least the following files for each year. Once the bill has been paid, file the bill here. These are examples of the most common bills that probably wouldn’t have the option for automation or to be electronic:

• Insurance
• Taxes (property and car registration)
• Medical bills
• Clothing or other retail credit cards

Set Two “Bill Paying” Days During the Month

In most cases, your paycheck cycle is going to be every two weeks or once a month. Set two days to pay bills during the month that are each close to one of the days when you get paid. For example, if you get paid on the 15^th and the 30^th, your bill paying days would be on the 1^st and the 16^th. On the 1^st, you would pay all bills that are due between that date and the 15^th. On the 16^th, you would pay all bills that are due between then and the 30^th.  If you get paid once a month, you’ll still want to set aside two bill paying days. One should be in the middle of the month and the other at the end/beginning of the month. This will make sure that everything is paid on time. 

In your monthly budgets, mark whatever your bill paying dates are in parenthesis by each expense. That way, you’ll know just by looking which bills get paid when. It may even be helpful to add up all of the expenses for each bill paying date so that you know how much you need to have in your account at those times. 

Open and File Bills Immediately

For paper bills that come through the mail, open them immediately and have two baskets or folders near where you open your mail. They should be marked 1 or 16 or whatever your bill paying dates are. Place the bills in the appropriate basket or folder. 

For electronic or paperless bills that you don’t have set up with automatic payments, set a few minutes every day for filing the bill notices that come through email into your Bills and Receipts folder on your computer. I do this in my five minutes set aside for reconciling my budget every day. Having this step as part of your daily routine makes it so you don’t have to go back and search for the bills in your email later. 

Even for bills that you do have set up with automatic payments, you may still want to do this so that it’s easy to go back and find a record of the bill at a later point. 

Automate Payments

In order to truly take some of the stress off of yourself for how to organize your bills and to save money on late fees, you’ll want to automate as many recurring payments as possible. In a perfect world, these should be set for a couple of days before they are due. If you don’t want to give multiple companies access to your money, another good option for automating bill payments is to use the BillPay function through your bank. This allows you to pay recurring or one-time bills online. Either way that you do it, I strongly suggest setting up recurring payments for any regular bills. It makes keeping up with them an organizational matter and not a determinant of whether they get paid on time or not. Remember, late payments often result in unnecessary extra fees, which is something you definitely want to avoid. 

Get Rid of As Much Paper as Possible

While there are some documents where a paper copy is needed, for the most part, you’ll want to get rid of as much paper as possible. That means opting for paperless statements or bills whenever you’re given the option. Bank statements are among my favorite examples for this because we can access our accounts online any time. That’s what we’re using for an accurate reflection of our accounts, not a paper statement that’s mailed once a month. Paper statements simply clutter up our space and eventually require shredding. That’s too much stress, time and effort for me. As an added bonus, many companies are willing to give you a discount or waive fees if you go paperless. 

If you don’t know how to select paperless bank statements, you can usually do it through your main account page online. It may say something like “statement options” or “document center.” If you don’t see it in either of those places, look in your account settings. 

If you really need to regularly look at your statements and don’t want to have to go into your account to access them every time, you can easily download them and store them on your computer or in the cloud for easy access. 

Keep a Spreadsheet for Recurring Payments

This is the organizational option that I mentioned earlier if you’re not keeping a regular budget. Keeping track in a spreadsheet of what you know needs to be paid on a monthly basis and when it will be paid will at least keep you on top of your most significant known expenses. I suggest the following pre-populated format. 

• Each month should have its own tab.
• Rows should be the name of the company or type of company to which payment is due. 
• Each of the following should get its own column:

1. Projected Payment Date. This is the date that you expect the payment to be made. This should be one of your two bill paying days. 
2. Automatic or manual payment. Indicate whether you have the bill set up for automatic payments or if you need to pay it yourself. 
3. Actual Payment Date. This should be noted after the payment has been made. 
4. Website link for accessing bills or payments if applicable. 

Bottom Line

The bottom line for how to organize bills is that having a system won’t make sure that there’s enough money in the bank to cover what you owe. That’s still up to you. It will though help to save time and money and lessen stress, which in turn will do wonders for your long-term health and wellness.  

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Do you scoff at the thought of making New Year’s resolutions or do you embrace the idea of setting expectations for yourself for the year to come? Whether we call them resolutions or goals, I absolutely fall into the latter category. I am a firm believer in the benefits of setting goals, and I want to share with you my top 5 reasons for why setting them is an inspiring way to start the year or for hitting reset at any time when it comes to your health and overall wellbeing. 

Please Note: As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases made through some of the links included in this post. You can read my disclosure policy here.

What are Goals?

Before we get into the benefits of setting goals, it’s important to understand what they are in the first place. While there are many useful definitions and systems out there that go into this more in-depth, the way that I look at goals is that they are specific and measurable milestones that help you to work toward your overall vision for your life. In other words, goals are statements of what you want to achieve. 

The Benefits of Setting Goals

While recognizing that everyone’s definition of achievement is different, here are my top 5 reasons for why setting goals is useful. 

1. Setting goals helps you to identify what it is that you want and what is important to you

Acclaimed author, speaker and businessman Stephen Covey offers sage advice on this with the second habit in his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People (Affiliate link). He suggests that we “Begin with the end in mind.” If done intentionally and thoughtfully, identifying your goals helps you to become crystal clear on what it is that you want. This is true for what I call your big Want, as in your overall vision for your life, as well as for your little wants or aspirations that will help you get there. I truly believe that you can’t get to where you want to go AND enjoy the journey along the way if you don’t have at least some idea of what your destination is.

2. Setting goals helps you to accomplish the things that you want to achieve

We can all come up with grand ideas of what we want to achieve. Unless you happen to be very lucky, the only way to turn those ideas into reality is by setting realistic goals and then following through on the steps needed to achieve them. 

3. Setting goals helps to keep you focused

One of the primary benefits of setting goals is that it helps to keep you on track and focused. It helps you to prioritize your time and energy. As Stephen Covey says, to begin with the end in mind “means to know where you’re going so that you better understand where you are now and so that the steps you take are always in the right direction.”  While we certainly don’t have to be “on task” every minute of every day, goals help us to make sure that we’re spending our time in a way that reflects what is important to us.  

4. Setting goals helps to give you purpose

We can all recognize that individual actions or tasks can sometimes seem mundane or meaningless. If you know though that they’re working toward a larger goal, it gives them meaning and helps you to feel an overall sense of purpose. If I would rather sleep 30 more minutes than get up and exercise, it may be hard to get motivated and do what I know is good for my body if I don’t have a goal in mind. On the other hand, having a goal of strengthening my body and increasing my endurance so that I can take part in and enjoy an upcoming hiking trip with my family is something that will have me out of bed and exercising with very few thoughts of protest. 

5. Achieving goals gives you a sense of satisfaction

As I mentioned before, a goal is a measurable milestone. According to Merriam-Webster, a milestone is a significant point in development. That means that it has never happened before, at least not in the same way. Since a goal is something that you’ve never accomplished before, then actually following through and doing it, will give you a tremendous sense of satisfaction. I remember the feeling that I had when I crossed the finish line after running my marathon. The only thing that has ever come close was giving birth. It was a feeling of “I have just done something that was so much bigger than anything that I thought I would ever do.” Now that’s a sense of satisfaction. 

Recommended Resources

As you think more about the possible benefits of setting goals and how to achieve them, I highly recommend the following resources.  

• 9 Types of Goals to get Your Life Moving in the Right Direction is a great article written by Leon Ho, the founder and CEO of Lifehack. It explains the different types of goals as well as how to put them in perspective using the S.M.A.R.T. Framework. 
• The Lifebook Online Program created by entrepreneurs Jon and Missy Butcher and offered through Mindvalley is a FREE program that walks you through the process of identifying your vision and goals in what they’ve identified as the primary 12 categories of life. The 6-week program requires 3-6 hours a week and costs $500 at the outset to ensure that you finish it. Once you’ve completed it, you can get 100 percent of your money back with no questions asked, but you will lose access to the program. If you want to retain access to all of the online resources, then you let them keep your payment. It’s important to note that I am not an affiliate of the program. After having taken it and having gotten my full payment back with no problem, I was simply so impressed by their entire process that I wanted to recommend it to you. 

Bottom Line on the Benefits of Setting Goals

The bottom line on the benefits of setting goals is that while having dreams and more concretely, a vision for your life are good, the catch is that in order to achieve them, you have to have goals. If you don’t like the idea of setting resolutions, then simply think about your goals for the year. Coming up with these gives you a set amount of time to get 1-3 milestones met that will work toward creating the life that you want. 

Lean on Your Community

Do you usually set resolutions or goals at the beginning of each year? Let us know in the comments either way about why you do or don’t. 

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